Can anyone help me?

This morning - as every morning - I'm trying to decide what to do when I grow up.

Should I be a pundit, politician, doorman, teenager?
Choosing right is vital, but choosing right is hard as unravelling the Mideast crisis or speaking better in public than The President of the United States, George W. Bush (Not to be confused with Daffy Duck!)

If you have any advice, I'd be grateful if you'd get it to me.

By the way, I'm sorry I implied that George W Bush is not eloquent, articulate, honest, able and effective. It was just a slip of the fingers and the mind...a momentary lapse into sanity.

Guapa I Segura

If your Catalan is rusty, I translate for you: "Good-looking and Confident."

It's uplifting to imagine these women both of the above, no?

Solving the Middle-East Peace Shortage

I like to imagine these two were conspiring to relieve the shortage of peace because nobody else seems to be managing it.
No: Not Condi Rice, the Big Cheeses in Israel, Syria, Lebanon or Cleveland (including its suburbs) or George W Bush or Putin or even Andrew Lloyd Webber.
Wish them luck!

Nude beach pic!

Barcelona attitudes are laid-back regarding nudity, especially among the most youthful -- like the boy shown here.

Just after his record-breaking pole-vault

He did the almost-impossible:
vaulting over a pole
only 2 inches in diameter!

For sheer awesomeness, this superb athlete
has reached astonishing new
lows.

The Girl-watcher

Notice how coy the girls play it around here?

Seconds before winning the World Yawning Championship!

A family asks, ‘Why?’

Girl strangles pet germ!

Stunned family members can't fully accept the death of a germ at the hands of a 9-year-old heterosexual girl.

Little Luna Cruz didn’t leave a note before locking her pet germ in the toilet and strangling it with prehistoric dental floss.

Her brother Roger Carrion, 128, discovered its lifeless body while casually examining the toilet with his $4 trillion electron microscope, official “CSI” forensics kit, and his 88-man scrutiny team.

Friends said Luna was shy when dressed, but outgoing and out-putting among male playmates.

Her brother saw no warning signs leading up to the murder.

He said the Luna had been trying on her new school strait jacket and skirt before heading up to the bathroom.

“She didn’t utter a word, or even say one. She just slid quietly up the stairway banister,” he said.

He said Luna was in a good mood, except for the first couple dozen hours Sunday.

“The only thing we can figure,” said the girl’s brother, “is that for fear of infecting her germ and causing it a painful death, she decided to end things quickly and fast yet rapidly with haste and dispatch.”

Luna was not available for comment or, for that matter, for anything, since she self-autopsied herself just before I wrote this.

XXX

You shouldn’t have read this article, should you?

USA ponders flying suicide pig attacks

US spy chiefs are considering training pigs to zoom over enemy targets. They (the pigs, not the chiefs!) would carry two tons of explosives each.

Plans are on hold until “The Decider” decides over which country this would be suitable. “The Decider”, since he is the one who decides, will decide exactly how much freedom and liberty this plan would provide to those killed.

American intelligence has set up a “pig committee” to potty-train the animals (the pigs, not the chiefs!) not dump where it would be politically excremental.

Right Wing media Leaks reveal a vital CIA warning: “Pig research won’t stand still; if we don’t experiment, other powers will – and they (The Bad People) may not be liberty-and-freedom-loving nor directly in touch with God.”

Another CIA proposal is to train pigs to fly into enemy searchlights and pooh upon them in vast amounts.

Meanwhile, pig experts (technically called “piggists”) suggest a “german warfare agent” could be used – or maybe something that’s taboo, like boogers.

Possible bottleneck: At the moment, pigs can't fly.

This is Mariano, Fighter for Liberty, Freedom and Parking Space!

Notice the lack of resemblance between Mariano a world-famous entertainer who is now dead but forgotten.

Mariano is the King of Parking around here.

Look for him if you're on c/ Balmes near the Travesera de Gracia.

Do Muslims Keep Kosher?

Condi Rice, George W Bush, Tony Snow and many others have avoided answering the above question -- and few Muslims have spoken out, either.

Why? I know not. But you can help!

Please help clarify this matter, if you can, by posting a comment on my blog.

I thank you in advance!

Could this REALLY be Mel Gibson?

Understandably, thesedays, Gibson maintains a low profile -- so low, in fact, our staff isn't sure this is really him in the flesh about to visit the Santa Catarina Market, La Pedrera, Barcelona at night and Don Quixote.

If you can make a positive identification, please notify me.

Thank you!

I didn't write this sentence!

Stress management inaction!

 

My Straight answer to the Millions

Literally thousands of hundreds of millions of you have disregarded my blog fully and completely in the manner of George W Bush or Vice President Cheney. It is time, therefore, to affirm my disbelieve that any public figure anywhere, including within the United States has acted really great.

Britney Spears apart, there has been a great morally ethically-free decline in freedom-loving beings everywhere. In fact, we should include Condi Rice in those forming an element of some group of those with whom she is classified. Am I right on that???

See? You simply do not have the courage of your beliefs on this point, whatever it may be.

And neither do I.

So let us together, rally round and avoid pornographic punctuation and other such things which is it unsafe for kiddies and or adults to read, or even look at the pictures of!!

The filthiest punctuation mark by FAR, as you know from personal experience and heart-rending indifference is the exclamation point. Avoid it!

Fox News -- My Honest Perspective

There is nothing anything like Fox News ANYWHERE except wherever you have a Fox News channel.

You see? I am one of the few inappropriate people who dares to speak out like a true coward on this contraversial subject!

Bill O'Reilly is definitely what he well and truly is, has been and is becoming - and I defy anyone to contradict me on this!

I dare to have the cowardice of my convictions.

Do YOU?

Perversion, pornography and persuasion

Several elements in today's society are driving everyone to lunacy: Pornographic inappropriatness, perverse persuasion and, of course, persuasive perversion.

I know you already realized these things, and so I mention them so you won't overtax your brain with new thoughts.

The emptiness of my remarks should and could be a relief.

Enjoy it -- and take out some time to get those brain cells jiggling from great thoughts, dreams and soaring ideals.

Avoid exclamation points!

Mideast crisis solved at last!

It is a pleasure to even imagine a headline like the one above, considering what's happening now in the mideast.
We all know whose fault the problems are.
Thank God the politicians are working hand-over-fist to bring peace and wealth to everyone!
Where would we be without politicians and their hands and their fists, anyhow?

I don't know.

You don't care.

I don't care, either.

-- But I hope we all survive...

Young lady admires old girl with white hair

 

Santa Caterina Market Fact

Note well: This blog is the only one on the web (or anywhere else) that does NOT mention the Santa Caterina Market!!